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Principles of Networking for Personal and Professional Successby John Bennett MPA, CMC
It has been said, You are only as strong as your Rolodex. Well, for most of us, a computer and a software program have replaced the Rolodex.
We establish, maintain, and utilize networks in order to build businesses, gain personal comfort and security with others, and develop personally and professionally. Networking is a two-way process. By giving to those in our network, we are more likely to receive from our network. Every networking relationship has at least four beneficiaries: you, your organization, the person with whom you are networking, and his/her organization.
There are diverse benefits of networking. These include people who have found their life-partners, avoided personal and financial disasters, made career changes, resolved conflicts, built businesses, met famous people, and more. Entering into a networking relationship with someone can provide many opportunities. Entering into a networking relationship with someone and developing it present responsibilities to the relationship and to the persons involved; however, with those responsibilities come many opportunities.
Here are some basic principles and suggestions for building, maintaining and utilizing personal and professional networks:
Seek to Understand Others Before You Seek to Have Them Understand You
When you meet people for the first time, invest 80% of the conversation in asking them questions about themselves and their business. Talk very little about yourself and your business. Engage others in conversations. Show curiosity about them, their interests, and their work. However, take great care to avoid questions that make others feel you are interrogating them or getting too personal. Only ask questions of others that you would be willing to answer for yourself. Follow this rule and you will avoid embarrassing situations.
Build Relationships
Networking is about building lasting relationships with little or no known expectation. Be sensitive to the differences of others. Carefully step into their context and recognize the differences. Networking takes time and hard work. Creating a network of people that you can call upon or to whom you can refer others can only be done one relationship at a time. Continuously assess whether a person you are working to add to your network is interested in being a part of your connection tree. Dont be too pushy yet be persistent. And, above all, be patient. A good relationship takes time to develop; it is worth the wait.
Generously Share Your Network With Others
If you have a referral for someone, dont wait until the next time you see that person. Share it immediately. A good rule of thumb is to give at least five times as many referrals to others as you expect in return. Maintain a list of 100 individuals to whom you can refer business as well as those who can refer business to you. Let people know they are on your referral list. Dont give the same referral to more than one or two people in your network. This will wear out your network and dilute your networking power.
Treasure Your Network
Networking is about building lasting relationships with little or no known expectation. When you begin to approach networking with the purpose of getting someone to buy a product or service, you are no longer networking. You are selling. Dont confuse the two.
Be Prepared to Tell Others About Yourself
Know yourself and be able to sell YOU. Offer something people desire. Talk convincingly about the value you offer. Motivate others to speak highly of you and what you have to offer. Deliver more than you promise. Seek ways to add value. Be prepared with a self-introduction. This is your elevator statement. You should have a 30-second introduction that tells who you are, what you do, whom you work for or represent, and the impact of your work.
Recognize Others
Send letters of congratulations to people who achieve milestones and deserve admiration. Carry thank-you notes with you so that you can write quick notes after you meet someone. Promptly writing a courtesy note or a thank-you note will create a lasting positive impression of you on the receiver. Encourage others to reach their dreams and goals. By helping others achieve their goals, you will get to know them better, possibly use your network to help them, and create an endearing networkship (thats a friends in your network).
Be Trustworthy
Build and maintain a positive reputation. Do no wrong. If you do, correct it immediately. Be above reproach. Do unto others as you would do for yourself. Follow this rule and you will live impeccably and will do the next right thing. This will help you win friends and influence people.
What You Give Will Be Returned
Constantly seek to understand the needs of others and link them with people in your network who have a solution. Sometimes the people in your network are not the immediate solution to another persons need, but through their network they can find a solution. Ask people in your network whom they want to meet. Help them by taking them to lunch or coffee or by introducing them at a networking event. Create a hub around which other networks are connected.
Become a mentor to others, you will help them grow and develop. You will help mold them into a good networker. By being a mentor, you are able to connect the person who is being mentored with people in your network. This connection will support both parties.
Continuously Learn Networking Skills
Identify people for your network who are excellent at networking. Add them to your network and learn from them. What events do they attend? Whom do they know? How do they handle themselves? How do they support others? Work with a professional coach to support you in your networking skill development. Get a mentor to help you learn ways to improve your networking skills.
Attend Networking Events
Look for events that will attract the people you want to add to your network. Remember that you are attending the event to meet people more than for the event itself. This may require you to participate in organizations and events that have little interest to you but which attract the people you need to get to know. These events offer rich opportunities to interact with people already in your network. Use networking events to cultivate and enrich existing relationships.
Extend Your Hand
Remember that no one is a stranger once you have introduced yourself. Make eye contact and repeat the persons name several times. Everyone likes hearing ones own name, and you will be more likely to remember it. If you have any doubt that the other people will recall your name, make it easy for them. Tell them your name and now they might remember you. Dont assume that everyone you remember will remember you. Practice your handshake so that you are comfortable shaking hands while looking the other person in the eye and talking.
Be an Attentive Listener
Let the other person speak; you will have time to tell your story when it counts; be patient. One of the greatest compliments you can give another person is to listen attentively and sincerely. Most people want to tell their story. Listen to them. Ask open-ended questions. Show an interest in what is important to them first and then relate to them from their perspective, not yours.
Share Conference Materials
When you attend a conference or seminar and you know of others who could benefit but are unable to participate, take along their agendas and bring information, contacts, and materials back for them. From this, you will participate with a clearer focus. You will help others be successful, and you will also be more likely to meet people that you would not otherwise meet because you are making connections for others. Furthermore, you will have supported some of the people in your network.
Learn from Others
Find a networking mentor from whom you can learn. Pay attention to the people who seem to have connections. Especially pay attention to the people you wish to meet. Ask them to help you develop your network. Ask them to tell you how they network. Ask them to allow you to shadow network with them.
Relate to Others
Learn to read personalities or thinking styles and use this knowledge to improve your communications and relationships. Dr. Alan Wolfelt of the Center for Loss and Life Transition in Colorado teaches companioning. Companioning means to ask others to teach you what they are going through so that you can help them more effectively. Then you can strive not to walk ahead of or behind them, but along side of them.
Ask, Without Questioning
When you meet people for the first time, invest 80% of the conversation in asking them questions about themselves and their business. Talk very little about yourself and your business. Engage others in conversation. Show curiosity about them, their interests, and their work. However, take great care to avoid questions that make others feel you are interrogating them or getting too personal. Only ask questions of others that you would be willing to answer for yourself. Follow this rule and you will avoid embarrassing situations.
Sell Yourself
Know yourself and be able to sell YOU. Offer something people desire. Talk convincingly about the value you offer. Motivate others to speak highly of you and what you have to offer. Deliver more than you promise. Seek ways to add value.
Distribute Business Cards
Always carry your business card, making sure you r business card looks as professional as you care to be remembered. If you are in a virtual business, you may choose to have your photograph printed on your card. Keep the text clean and succinct. Make sure the information is up-to-date and provides appropriate ways for people to contact you. Avoid printing a great deal of text about who you are and what you do. Avoid listing more than three contact numbers.
Make Referrals Quickly
If you have a business referral for someone, dont wait until the next time you see that person. Share it immediately. A good rule of thumb is to give at least five times as many referrals to others as you expect in return. Maintain a list of 100 individuals to whom you can refer business as well as those who can refer business to you. Let people know they are on your referral list.
Follow Up On All Contacts
Identify at least one thing you can do to follow up with all new contacts. This may mean sending them a recent article on a subject of common interest, passing along a greeting to a mutual friend, or connecting them with someone in your network. You can also send them a note saying how pleased you are to have met them. Use this follow-up as a way of reconnecting with the person you have just met and do it within 48 hours.
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John Bennett, MPA, CMC, is president of Lawton & Associates, a management consulting firm that helps individuals and organizations prepare for, excel through, and improve from change. He is a consultant, executive coach, speaker, and trainer. Mr. Bennett
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