
Motivation
Liberate Yourself From The Opinions And Judgments Of Othersby Mark Victor Hansen
Are you constantly trying to maintain the peace in your office or home by making sure everyone is happy? Do you find yourself walking on eggshells everywhere you go, hoping no one will "start something"? Are you afraid of ruffling feathers when you’re out with your friends, so you agree with whatever they say? If you said yes to any of these questions then you my friend are a people pleaser, or on the fast track to becoming one.
I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with wanting everyone to be happy. Heck no! I want everyone to be happy 24 hours a day. But I’m not willing to compromise who I am to make that happen.
Sometimes you have to ruffle a few feathers and that’s okay. You can’t be a "lesser" you just to make someone else happy. That’s not the way it works. Express yourself. Go ahead. But do it with love and a gentle voice. You’re not challenging anyone. You’re just being your authentic self.
When you stop saying "yes" to everyone and start expressing how you really feel, be prepared. The people you have only known the "suppressed" you are going to give you funny looks and you’ll probably hear "what’s gotten into you" quite a bit. A few so-called friends may not ever speak to you again. But isn’t it better know who your true friends are?
When you have a clear purpose, you won't have time for negativity.
You can’t make everyone happy. I’m sure you’ve heard this most of your life. It seems like a surface statement it goes in one ear and out the other but it runs very deep. You will never be able to please everyone. No matter what you do, what decisions you make, what kind of car you drive or where you live someone is going to be disappointed with you. Putting the opinions and judgments of others before your own will only result in your failure. Learn to trust and believe in yourself for phenomenal success.
In closing, I'd like to offer an exercise to complete in the week ahead:
Do you have people in your life that you are constantly trying to please? Are these people who you look to for approval? Do they always have opinions about your life and what you’re doing wrong?
Normally, we all have at least one of these people in our lives. But why do people
Act negatively towards us when we try to better ourselves? It’s not usually out of spite. Most of the time these people are either insecure about themselves and their lives or afraid that once we begin living our dreams they’ll be left behind.
So, how do you keep your mind and your focus on your goals when these people are around? Well, the first step would be decide who you really want in your life people who are going to support you or people who are going to bring you down. You are going to change your life and you don’t need any negative distractions. If those around you can’t listen and support you in your efforts, then they have no place in your life Period.
If for some reason you cannot remove these people from your life, then you’ll have to decide not to discuss your life with them. If they ask you questions about what’s going on in your life tell them you’d rather not discuss it with them. Eventually they will stop asking and go away. If they offer advice anyway, simply thank them for the advice and ignore them. Try this a few times and see what happens. Negativity only survives where it is allowed to feed starve it and it will move on.
-----------------
Mark Victor Hansen. All right reserved. For information contact Frog Pond at 800.704.FROG(3764) or email susie@frogpond.com.